When I posted my Week in Photos yesterday and wrote about the new book I am reading Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking I got a couple of comments in return. Most notably my best friend from college who I discovered is an INFJ, something I didn’t know before. That explains a lot about our relationship with me being an INTJ.
I’ve been called cold, snobby, elitist, a bitch and argumentative. Definitely argumentative. I’m not. At least I really don’t think I am. There are so many layers and so many more ways to see everything on this planet, every single argument, every single situation, every problem. There are just so many solutions that lots of people do not see, do not think about. And I really have to see all sides of things. It helps me get to the root of whatever I am looking at. It helps me make a decision. Which annoys my fiancé so completely! He sees everything in black and white. I see the value in that but for me knowing there is always more means I have to dig deeper. It’s who I am.
For example our most recent issue. We needed a piece of luggage to check (we never check but the wedding calls for more stuff to be brought on the plane) and a garment bag for our wedding attire things. I found the perfect piece of carry-on luggage for me which includes an optional garment bag section which folds away when not in issue. Perfect for future uses. This suitcase is sweet and solved the garment bag problem easily and I was due for a new piece of carry-on baggage anyway. For the check bag problem I figured that we would buy Brad a new piece of carry-on and use his old carry-on as the check. We avoid checking whenever possible. Hate it! And would likely never need a piece of check luggage in the future. But all he saw was – we need a check piece buy a check piece. He didn’t consider the other options. Lots of people wouldn’t. It’s definitely normal. And there’s nothing wrong with it. But I’m pleased as punch with myself for seeing this solution. And he now has a Cadillac for a his carry-on. A real beauty I can’t wait for us to take on the road after our wedding.
Anyway back to the book and being an introvert (not just my Myers-Briggs). She starts out describing the extremely extrovert business world, business school, advertising, etc. how our culture (the USA’s that is) values extroverts and how introverts have no place. She right. I hate that she is right but we have to be fake extroverts whether we like it or not if we want to get ahead.
I am so not an extrovert. I am almost a true introvert. I spend a great deal of time in my head. I like it in there. I am my own best friend. And I’m not really interested in pretending to be an extrovert. It’s too energy draining. Every night I have to go home and recharge from the day, from all the people, from work. I spend whole days by myself where I don’t have to be “on”. I can’t imagine having to do more. It would kill me.
Which means of course that is what I think about incessantly after a meeting – did I do enough? Did I speak up enough? Did I say the wrong thing? Ad nauseum until I find something else to obsess over. And there will always be something else to obsess over.
Oh and about the outfit – I own so little pastel I am surprised I had this and could participate in Everybody Everywear today.
Green prairie top: Avenue (June 2008)
Powder Blue cardigan: Lane Bryant (Aug 2010)
Skinny/Slim leg dark wash jeans: Lane Bryant (March 2011)
Pink floral flip flops: Payless (April 2011)
Swallow silver necklace: Thrifted (June 2011)
Teardrop Earrings: Evans UK (Feb 2011)